


Candy, Corny

by leiascully



Category: House M.D.
Genre: Come As You Aren't Challenge, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-10-31
Updated: 2007-10-31
Packaged: 2017-10-03 06:25:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leiascully/pseuds/leiascully
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Foreman likes Halloween after all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Candy, Corny

**Author's Note:**

> Timeline: S4  
> A/N: For [**karaokegal**](http://karaokegal.livejournal.com/)'s [Come As You Aren't Party](http://karaokegal.livejournal.com/141769.html)! Happy Halloween! It counts as a costume because it's H/F and it's as fluffy and sugary as cotton candy.   
> Disclaimer: _House M.D._ and all related characters are the property of Shore Z, Bad Hat Harry, and Fox. No profit is made from this work and no infringement is intended.

Foreman was creasing the dimples in his tie with a fingernail. He might have slunk back to Princeton, but damned if he wasn't going to do things right this time. He had his pride. At least he wouldn't show up looking like Chase and Cameron, whose fashion sense seemed to have decreased since they'd been re-hired.

Unfortunately, his determined self-examination was interrupted by a loud slurping sound.

"Come 'ack 'oo bed, punkin," House said, sucking in his lips around the fake fangs he'd gotten from somewhere. Foreman didn't even want to imagine where they'd been. "Gi' us a kiss."

"Not as long as you're wearing those," Foreman said coolly. "This may surprise you, but I didn't come back because I missed your irrational behavior and sideways endearments." At least "pumpkin" wasn't much of a slur. House was losing his touch. Foreman suspected the influence of the new hires; House was acting like a sadistic nursery school caretaker with all those young lives to warp.

House bared the plastic teeth in a horrible approximation of a grin. "Oo'll get 'em now or," he paused to slurp again, "la'er."

"I think the definition of a one-night stand is that it only lasts one night," Foreman said, with hardly a twinge of regret. His tie finally looked perfect.

"Oo use too many words," House said with disdain.

"You might want to get up," Foreman reminded him. "I'm leaving in ten minutes and there's no way you're keeping my keys. You'd probably leave a 'Please rob me' sign on the door."

"Secret hobo signs," House said, sounding satisfied. He rolled himself out of bed and hobbled up behind Foreman, wrapping himself around Foreman in a way that was no doubt calculated for maximum wrinkling potential. He tugged at Foreman's tie and managed to spit the plastic teeth down Foreman's shirt. "Told you."

Foreman wriggled away and hopped around the room trying to keep the teeth from prickling his stomach. He ripped the tails of his shirt from his pants and shook the fangs to the floor, but his shirt was crumpled and had drool tracks all down the front. He unbuttoned it, glaring at House, and flung it to the floor. His tie hung loose around his neck.

"Now see," said House, "if you'd just left it that way in the first place, we wouldn't have to go through this song and dance."

"Jesus," muttered Foreman, and sank his teeth into House's shoulder.

"There," said House later, lounging on the couch. "Better not to go to work today anyway. I booby-trapped the whole hospital. God, I love having minions who actually do the things I tell them to. No one's going to be able to move in that place without animatronic screaming and puddles of slime and fake cobwebs."

"Cuddy's going to turn you into a real corpse when she finds you," Foreman said lazily. He reached under his hip and tossed the plastic vampire teeth across the room.

"Pfff," House countered, "I'm sure you know some voodoo to bring me back."

Foreman sighed and fished in the bowl on the coffeetable for a handful of mini candy bars. At least if House went into a sugar coma, he might shut up for a while.

"Oooh, tricks _and_ treats," House said. "I must have been a good boy."

Foreman laughed for the first time in what had to be a couple of months, and House bared his teeth in what was probably supposed to be a grimace, but showed his dimple, and pushed an unwrapped morsel of chocolate into Foreman's mouth. Foreman decided that he liked Halloween after all.


End file.
